In case anyone hasn’t noticed, I think we’ve moved out of the “it seems like everyone is on facebook” days and into the “what, you mean you DON’T have a facebook?” days (by the way, I still think its hilarious that people call it “a” facebook).
Now most will argue that facebook is a wonderful thing. They’ll say things like, “People are becoming more connected, isn’t that wonderful?” And while I think people connecting with others is a wonderful thing, I’m not quite sure why it has to be done digitally instead of face-to-face. Doesn’t it seem that this kind of behavior may have some kind of adverse effects that we might not anticipate? I mean, people ARE supposed to have emotionally engaging, real-life relationships with each other, right?
But don’t get me wrong. Back in 2004, I thought facebook was an absolute blast. I was in college and had a large social life to keep up with. Facebook was just another way to let all of your acquaintances know where to go for a party or organize an event. So why wouldn’t this social network be a gift from the gods? After all, look how much MORE interaction you can have with MORE people without even leaving your home!
Well, see, there’s the catch. With social networking sites, we’ve definitely increased the BREADTH of our relationships while at the cost of the DEPTH of those relationships. (Read this story I found about Anna, a facebook addict, for a little more perpective.)
After 6 years with facebook, I’m no longer sure its such a wonderful thing to be basing your incredibly important emotional life on a “social application,” made up of only pixels, advertisements, and only the things that your “friends” (or acquaintances that you normally wouldn’t keep in your life) want you to see. I’ll repeat that again. Your friends are only posting things that they WANT you to see.
Which leads to my next question: What if facebook is becoming a new form of social advertising?
What if all of this is just a new way to display your social wealth, a digital form of peacocking? Why does your friend posts photos of herself with myriads of friends at fun places, but her pose is always the same in each picture? Why does your buddy brag about his new vehicle and post photos of it from every angle possible? Why do I need to know what strangers are having for dinner, or where they are going this weekend, or if they had a flat tire, or if they failed a test, or if they don’t like rainy days? The list goes on. (Author’s note: Check out this fun website, which features an extensive listing of embarrassing and unnecessary status updates)
Now, I’m not saying that facebook is completely useless, and I’m not saying that social networking sites aren’t sometimes an incredible tool. I’m a web designer, and I’m fully aware of what all social networking sites have to offer. Trust me, I still go on facebook a few times a week, and I still like talking to a few of my friends on it. I’d love to be totally anti-facebook, but I also believe that some good comes from being on facebook. But, when we let it change who we are by changing how we interact with others, its more likely that we will be left unsatisfied with our social life. There is no replacement for real human relationships.
In conclusion, facebook itself isn’t the enemy. But maybe we shouldn’t be regarding it as something important enough to check everyday, or in some cases, update while driving. I think it’s more important to focus our time on developing ourselves and loved ones, rather than gossiping, judging, and comparing their lives to strangers who we shouldn’t really care about.
(Should you quit facebook? Check out The Top 10 Reasons to Quit Facebook.)
